A thought on my friends...

This one comes in two parts, the part italicized comes from the myspace page I have. The rest is normal.

The more I sit around, and explore life, explore the countryside that surrounds me, explore who I am. The more I wish my friends could hang so I could tell them things that I'm thinking. Instead of via text, blog or email.

I miss interpersonal connections. It seems that as of late all I get for discourse is between my wife or my daughter and myself. Or whoever is in earshot at work. Not like I want to be close all the time to my friends. Smother them if you will. I just want to talk, someone to show whats on my mind. Or someone to at least sound something to, get an idea, bounce a thought across the mists and see what happens with it.

Is it wrong, to want that connection with someone other than those I'm connected to via blood? Is it wrong to desire to be with someone who can bounce feelings back and forth to you? Is it wrong to have feelings and not be able to get an unbiased look at them?

It gives one pause to look at their life, look at all the good things that have happened over the time, and realize that the majority of your friends were not there to see it. I enjoy things with my wife and child, but that, like working all the time, makes one dull. I crave new experiences, new things to try, see, and do. When the good things happen in my life, it seems as if no one is around to see it. When bad things happen, everyone gets to know.

Often times I wonder why I have the friends I do. Why they came to me, why they chose to be friends. And why, when shit got thick, did they either stay or go? Things like this baffle me, and keep me up some nights. But not this one. For now, I'm off to bed.